Calvin Tilokee 0:02
Hello and welcome to the midlife crisis podcast. I’m your host Calvin, also known as Revparblems on Instagram. I’m excited to do this talk show with my best friends from high school and college. Steve and Mikko, what can you expect on this podcast? Well, I like to call it a talk show for Men of a Certain Age. We’re not quite old. But we’re the kind of guys that have to make sure we don’t miss our alcohol on a night out, you know, we’ll chat about current events, trending topics, and things that we just need to get on our soapbox about knowing us. We’ll be laughing the whole time. And ladies, don’t worry if you ever wanted to know what your husband or boyfriend talks about in the man cave. Stick around. Now, keep in mind, we’re old enough to remember when Parental Advisory stickers went on CDs. We don’t know what CDs are. You’re too young for this podcast. Speaking of which, make sure you have your headphones in. It’s NSFW as these kids say. We’ll be bringing that flavor to your weekly on your way to work while you’re shaving. Or just sitting around wondering why your back hurts but let’s get this show on the road. Hello and welcome to midlife crisis podcast. I’m your host Calvin Haye. As always with my boys Steve and Mikko, bringing that flavor to your ear on a weekly basis. On today’s episode, we’ll be getting y’all ready for the holidays. Everything from ho, ho, ho to holiday parties. We bring in you are Chris Rock quote of the week. I don’t like that jerk. I don’t know that shit. And as always get off my lawn. Or first How was the week fellas?

Steve 1:26
I had a killer week. I did. It was a good week all around. I’ve been getting into this home automation stuff. And geeking out on it. And government Christmas shopping done. Fucking set. Nice.

Calvin Tilokee 1:42
Good. Yeah, everything you

Mikko Miller 1:45
no Christmas shopping done.

Calvin Tilokee 1:46
Not much. I’ve done some, but not a lot.

Mikko Miller 1:51
Zero.

Steve 1:53
Got it all done. Really? Last thing came today. And yeah, I wanted that. Shit off my plate. wanted it done.

Calvin Tilokee 2:02
That’s good, man. That’s good. That’s good. Yeah. Be prepared. Oh, man.

Mikko Miller 2:08
That’s that family man life.

Steve 2:10
Yeah, it really is. You know? You got the kid involved. You got to plan ahead.

Calvin Tilokee 2:16
Yeah.

Mikko Miller 2:17
I just been buying shit for me.

Calvin Tilokee 2:19
Yeah, you’re gonna be like, like the rest of us clowns on Christmas Eve? Uh huh. Let me get some,

Steve 2:23
well, you know, with COVID in all, I mean, the Postal Service is backed up, everything’s backed up. So I don’t take any chances. You know, you’re locked up enough as it is to then have, you know, shitty Christmas Day or like a bunch of IO use?

Calvin Tilokee 2:39
Yeah, I feel you. You actually actually reminded me of last year, I went to get I actually went on Christmas Eve, to get an extra gift for my wife. Right. So like, I had already had a gift. But then I got an idea late. And I was like, let me get this because she’s the kind of person she’ll give you a list. Mm hmm. And she might give me a list of like, 10 things. And then I always pick something from the list. And then I try to get something that she doesn’t expect that maybe she forgot that she wanted or whatever, right? So it turns out last October, we’re in Europe. And when we were in Florence, she was really looking at this bag for a long time. And she ended up not buying it. But I took a picture and I kept a mental note. I’m like, I’m going to get it for Christmas. So I had to, like hunt around or whatever. Find it. So on Christmas Eve, I’m in the mall, and I checked like online, the inventory, whatever they said they had it. So I go into the spot. And I’m asking about it. And this lady behind the counter is all like, you know, well, you know, you came in here on the last day, you know at the last minute to get a gift and I’m like I’m just looked at I was like What makes you think this is the only gift she’s getting? Right? Right right. You know, like the audacity Are you gonna judge me? So what if it was the last minute bitch is still is Christmas Eve? Christmas here.

Mikko Miller 4:00
Do your job. Exactly. Just

Calvin Tilokee 4:03
Can you just bag the shit up? People man

Mikko Miller 4:10
people fucking crazy.

Calvin Tilokee 4:12
How about you Mikko?

Mikko Miller 4:13
Nothing worth noting about? I have been on this mystery box craze though. What is a? It’s when you order shit. And you know someone says it’s $100 but the price of the mystery box the valuables in it is worth like 150 to 200 in your home, you want to hope in a prayer that no one’s going to like send you like a pair of shorts or a pair of socks and you just pay 200 bucks for it. You know what I mean? So hence the mystery in the mystery box. So I didn’t even order it like I think ordered for this last week or actually four came in this last week. And I just been like opening that stuff up and um, yeah, just been doing that. Like I haven’t really like done much but open mystery boxes all week. Would you?

Steve 4:57
I’m dying to know.

Mikko Miller 4:58
Okay, so one was a $250 mystery box. And it was supposed to have like shoes and stuff like that. So this one had like two pairs of Jordans. And one pair of like Nike Air maxes, and it was worth like, you know, 400 bucks that was worth it. And then another one that I had was like supreme and like t shirts and stuff like that accessories, I paid 150 and I got about a $200 value out of the box. So stuff like that, like just dumb shit, you know, raffle stuff off online. So no raffles and stuff.

Calvin Tilokee 5:30
Yeah, that’s pretty cool. So who participates in it’s just like other people in a group or something.?

Mikko Miller 5:35
Um, there’s usually like, an Instagram page that does it, or there’s a website that does it in, you know, the list of price to 50. And you can pick extra large, large medium shirts, or you want supreme accessories or you want shoes and you tell them your size. And they’ll try to cater the box, you know, according to your size so that you don’t get like some extra small shit when you’re like a fucking double XL, you know? Like, nobody would want that shit. And sometimes it’s used stuff, which is kind of fucked up. Sometimes they send you stuff, but usually to let you know beforehand, like hey, I’m gonna send you some new stuff that you can kind of like flip online. I don’t go for those. I like all my shit. Brand new. Right? Yeah, like there’s disclaimers. They’re supposed to tell you if they’re gonna send you like some new shit. Oh, that’s

Calvin Tilokee 6:21
cool.

Steve 6:21
That is cool.

Mikko Miller 6:23
Well, different. You know, it’s like Christmas every week.

Calvin Tilokee 6:26
Yeah, you can even go away by we you could just log off now you go your holiday. That’s right. That’s pretty cool. That’s cool. Yeah.

Steve 6:37
How about you Cal?

Calvin Tilokee 6:38
Yeah, what about Yeah, this week was jovem. Yeah, we were up in Vermont. So I actually just drove back today. So yeah, I spent the week up there, get this beautiful house on the lake. We had fireplace in the house. So I got a lot of practice building a fire. And we got really good at it by the end of the week. So it was cool. It was just really chill. Friday, my wife actually took off of work completely. So we just kind of went out to town and went to this bookstore. And I grabbed The dynasty, which is all about the Patriots.

Mikko Miller 7:11
Oh, yeah. Yeah, I saw that post.

Calvin Tilokee 7:13
And you know, it’s funny, because everything that I brought up on the last episode, this is exactly what this book is about. I haven’t put the shit down in two days. Yeah, this book is like 500 pages long. I’m three quarters of the way through it in like a day and a half. No joke. Damn. Yeah, it’s like a nice behind the scenes. It starts from I mean, Robert Kraft and his background and how he even got the money to buy the Patriots how he bought the Patriots. But there’s a lot of really cool insider stories and stuff. And it ties into a lot of what we talked about on the last episode about workplace culture and stuff like that. So I mean, I’d recommend anybody read it. Obviously, if you’re a fan of football, especially the Patriots, you’re going to love it. But it’s unique insight to like how an organization is built and run and somebody stories my favorite one was about Belichick where he basically took the job and like resigned the next day from the jets and fuck the Jets Over and the Jets fans are bitter now because they feel like if he didn’t do that, they would have had all that success. But what I didn’t realize was that he accepted the job without knowing that the Patriots had sent a fax to the Jets asking to speak to him to interview him for the Patriots job. And at that point, Bill Parcells was like the general manager of the Jets. Parcells gets the facts. He crumpled it up and threw it in the trash. Belichick never heard about he never saw it accepts the job and everything. And then they can read through this press conference. And then the day of the press conference, Belichick goes to Parcells, he was like, you know, something’s been eating at me. I heard that the Patriots sense of communication to speak to me. Is that true? process goes Yeah, but you already signed a contract to do the job. So you just said quote, fuck it. Dude did What do you mean? Yeah, crazy. I mean, talk about work, workplace culture, like we were talking about last week. So that’s why Belichick said, fuck this, I’m not taking this job, and ended up going to the Patriots. And that whole thing ended up in court between the two teams because of contractual obligations, and the Jets wouldn’t let him out of it and all that kind of stuff. So it got to the point where he may not have been able to coach at all for three years, which, I mean, nobody’s gonna want a guy who hasn’t been coaching in any capacity for three years. I mean, imagine not working for three years voluntarily almost, and then say, Yeah, well, I’m gonna come back to work. Or it’d be tough for anybody, you know, but yeah, I think like, that’s a unique side of what we all know of that story. Cuz Belichick does kind of look like an asshole doing that, but he clearly had a reason for it. I think anybody would have done something like that, you know? But yeah, no, it’s a great book. I’ll probably finish it as soon as we’re done with this. But for those of you listening the the Amazon link will be in the show notes we you know, get you a little discount on that book. Get that in time for I wouldn’t say a stocking stuffer cuz it’s a big ass book. Just make sure you got a big stocking but uh, you know, be a nice gift for somebody. This speaking of gifts, and Whoa, whoa, whoa, and all that was started the beginning. How long did you guys believe in Santa when you were kids?

Steve 10:33
I think until at least six. Okay, yeah, six, six or seven for me say around that

Mikko Miller 10:42
six or seven for me for sure.

Calvin Tilokee 10:45
Hmm, definitely for me, too. And I remember when I guess the aura of it was I’ll use the word destroyed, because I can’t think of a better word right now. But it wasn’t that. I was. I just I can’t think of a different word at the moment. That’s less dramatic than that.

Steve 11:04
Though, I mean, when you when you find that Santa is not real. I mean, I guess yeah, you’re crashing down. Yeah, I guess.

Calvin Tilokee 11:12
But it’s the that’s the day it wasn’t like that. So like, I was about seven. And my room. We had those like kind of folding doors, you know, it kind of comes in like a V, you know, you know, just kind of doors and there’s like, like slits, you know, for like Windows or whatever. That was a door to my room. So I’m laying in bed. And you know, it’s the night before Christmas. So you can’t really sleep and you just kind of like toss it and turn or whatever. And I happen to be laying face in my door. And I see my dad leave his bedroom, which was just directly at the end of the hall, like straight outside my door and I see him leave the room and go downstairs and I was like, he’s the one doing it. So it wasn’t so much destroyed. It was kind of like, Oh, he’s Santa.

Mikko Miller 11:53
Yeah,

Calvin Tilokee 11:53
okay, I get it. But it was so cool. So I was like, I I get it. So we gonna have some shit waiting in the morning.

Steve 12:03
I don’t know how old I was. I must have been five. Should I imagine I was old enough to remember. So I was like five or something. And I remember hearing like hooves or something. I mean, their hooves Who the hell knows something on the roof of my house. And I remember seeing a red light fly through the air. I could easily explain that as the airplane going by. And I’ve asked my dad for and I’ve even I’ve even asked him this. After we’ve had a couple of drinks. Did he ever throw snowballs on the roof to make me think that it was you know, the reindeer hooves and shit? And he’s always said no. But I heard. And then, you know, I think I’ve mentioned a movie that Santa wasn’t real. And it kind of fucked me up. I remember being bitchy, you know, you still get presents about it. And you know,

Calvin Tilokee 12:53
like, yeah, I’m so open is given a joy. But yeah, yeah. My bad attitude. Okay.

Mikko Miller 13:03
Yeah, mine was at seven, et CIE at six. I really believe in Santa Claus. Because I had wrote my name, I remember in a red marker on a white sock. like one of those, you know, socks that had like the red and yellow and blue stripe on it, the little high top socks. And I wrote my name in permanent marker on that, you know, because we were supposed to like hang up stocking. So I thought socks stocking, same thing, you know, foreign language language barrier. And so this was in Germany, I hung up socks, and I came back after like, we went to like, midnight mass or something. And the socks were clean, like, brand new sun clean. And then there was like a gift from Santa underneath it. Like oh, shit, Santa is real Santa. It’s real. But then the next year, I did the same thing. In I remember, like my parents from the other room. I guess they weren’t, like listening or didn’t know that. I was like, right around the corner. With like, you know, make sure your son doesn’t write with permanent marker on the socks, or else your friend is gonna have to like get new socks from the store again, like last year. It’s like, oh, man, my dad and one of his army buddies, like get new socks from the store that he could replace it so that I think Santa’s clean my sock for me.

Calvin Tilokee 14:23
See that? That’s a hard way to find out.

Mikko Miller 14:26
You know, if I get I still got to speak and spell that I wanted that year. So fuck it. Exactly. Go.

Calvin Tilokee 14:36
Oh, man. Yeah. So a couple years ago, it was around the holidays. I might you know, that with my family and stuff. I have a cousin who we ended up getting in on this whole conversation of Santa. And this dude says that he never told any of his kids about Santa. And he and my mom’s friends were like, what? And he’s like, yeah, you know, I never told any of my kids about Santa. I don’t want to believe in in that nonsense. You know, I wanted to know if they got some that is from me. And I’m just like I said, How sad of a childhood is that? Yes, it is true. You know, I mean, like, that’s the age, you know, up until like, five, six. That’s when kids like get their imagination. It’s okay to believe in some, you know, I mean, that’s what it’s for. And he’s, you know, he’s like, Yeah, well, I want them to know that that gives me and this and that. In my head. I’m like, how insecure you got to be to not want to give a fictional character credit. Yeah, he’s not real heat. Like, nobody’s gonna move out and be like, Yo, I’m gonna live in Santa man. He take care of me. Like, what’s wrong with you? We’re gonna find out at some age that it was you and then you can be Oh, shit, you know, all that time. It was you. That’s cool. I mean, you got to be a bitch. Like for real?

Steve 15:51
Who was this guy?

Calvin Tilokee 15:53
It’s a cousin. No. Yeah.

Mikko Miller 15:59
Wow. He probably doesn’t do the whole tooth fairy. He doesn’t do any of the What is that? The Easter Bunny. He doesn’t do any of that shit.

Calvin Tilokee 16:08
Probably not. I mean, yeah, I didn’t even like I mean, I’m 40 I didn’t want to hear any more man. Like Yeah, you fucking it up for me. I don’t I’m not talking to you about this anymore. She’s

Steve 16:18
come out of a rabbit. They come out of my house. You know?

Calvin Tilokee 16:23
What do you think? I laid him a fucking rabbit can Lino eggs?

Mikko Miller 16:33
science?

Calvin Tilokee 16:36
Valentine’s Day? I’m Cupid. Yes, you should be walking around in his diaper and a bow and arrow. I do that shit, man. For love a

Mikko Miller 16:45
grown man running running depends. Fuck out here.

Calvin Tilokee 17:09
Oh, bam. But so I got a list of movies that I have to watch every holiday season before it’s like it feels real. Okay, so I’m a rundown mine and then you guys give me yours. So mine always got to be Love Actually, at least once? Oh, yeah. More like three or four times every year. But if I don’t see it once, that and then the sound of music. And How the Grinch Stole Christmas. Once I’m done with that we can have Christmas.

Steve 17:41
It’s a good list. It’s love actually is a funny movie. Yeah,

Calvin Tilokee 17:46
yeah. That’s a good movie. That’s just all around good. You know? It’s gotta love romances. You gonna laugh a little bit everything.

Mikko Miller 17:56
Not bad.

Calvin Tilokee 17:57
How about you guys? What’s up? What’s on your holiday movie list?

Mikko Miller 18:01
You got Steve.

Steve 18:02
I’m a movie guy. So my list is a bit longer. National Lampoon’s Christmas vacation. diehard Bad Santa? Friday after next.

Calvin Tilokee 18:14
Yes.

Steve 18:16
I mean, the Christmas story. screws, Scrooge Krampus. The night before.

Calvin Tilokee 18:23
Wow.

Steve 18:24
I got up to like 15. And yeah, wow. Because like, I usually have the time off leading up to Christmas. And so I I watch a shit ton of movies. And I love it.

Mikko Miller 18:37
Nice. Yeah. It’s crazy list. Man. That’s a lot of fucking movies. I just had like three. Okay, now Yeah.

Steve 18:45
So many good. movies like diehard that you don’t think associate with Christmas. It takes place during Christmas.

Calvin Tilokee 18:52
So Alright, so we got to jump into that. Mikko before we get your list because that was one of the bullet points. Yeah, let’s go the age old bait is diehard a Christmas movie.

Steve 19:01
It’s an action movie that takes place during Christmas. Okay,

Mikko Miller 19:05
yeah. I’ll take that. I’ll take that. I’ll take Okay.

Calvin Tilokee 19:09
That was no debate at all.

Mikko Miller 19:15
No debate at all.

Steve 19:19
What about you Mikko?

Mikko Miller 19:20
Like I said, my list was just three that I always associate with Christmas. I mean, of course, there’s Miracle on 34th Street. There’s always the sound of music. There’s always like that kind of stuff. But for me, it always hits home when I watched. What’s that Ryan Reynolds movie just friends.

Steve 19:35
Yeah, that’s a good one, too. That was on my list too.

Mikko Miller 19:39
Oh, to go see, just friends like I am a Ryan Reynolds fan. He makes me swoon. So right Ryan Reynolds fan big Ryan Reynolds fan. Just friends elf Yeah,

Calvin Tilokee 20:01
oh, yeah, yeah.

Mikko Miller 20:04
Yeah, I always have elf. And that’s one of the things that I like pay attention to. It makes me feel like it’s the holiday season and I’m home alone. Home Alone always just like, makes me feel like yeah, those are the three that I think if I’m going to associate Christmas with movies, it’d be those three for me.

Calvin Tilokee 20:24
Nice, nice. Yeah.

Mikko Miller 20:26
Yeah, I got to add Elf on their health. For sure. For sure.

Calvin Tilokee 20:29
I do gotta admit, as much TV and movies I watch does a lot of shit. You’d be surprised that I haven’t seen and I watched l for the first time like, two years ago.

Mikko Miller 20:41
Funny, right? Really?

Calvin Tilokee 20:43
It’s fucking hilarious. Yeah. I can’t believe I’ve never watched it. I will say I like Will Ferrell and I liked him on SNL. But a lot of the movies I’ve seen him in I just, I just didn’t get into, you know. So when I saw it was him. I think that’s what kind of made me some then maybe I’ll catch him. Maybe I won’t. And I just never really watched it. And then it was on TV. It was just I think we happen to catch it from the beginning. So like, I’ll watch it and I’m like, this. It was hilarious in this movie. I can’t believe I’ve ever seen this. You know? Fantastic. That’s another one now. Yeah, cuz last year, we were like that. We were like, Listen, it’s holidays. We need to see elf like so it. It made its way up the list. So I forgot that one. Nice. Nice.

Mikko Miller 21:24
Nice.

Steve 21:25
What about a Gremlins?

Mikko Miller 21:29
Oh,

Calvin Tilokee 21:32
have you seen Gremlins? It’s so long. I know. I forgot it was associated with Christmas at all.

Mikko Miller 21:36
Elementary School. That’s like elementary school. I mean, if you had to toss in Gremlins wasn’t et during Christmas time to

Steve 21:44
know Halloween? Halloween, because they all dressed up and he was trying to do Reese’s Pieces. Yeah,

Mikko Miller 21:51
you dude. Grambling

Steve 21:54
cheese Gremlin

Calvin Tilokee 21:56
Actually, I got a funny story about Gremlins. I should remember this for a Halloween episode, but apparently so Christmas movie so I guess it fits. I remember we had an elementary school we had a sleep over right where you get a sleeping bag and we slept over like in the school or? Yeah, like auditorium awesome shit. It was like it was like, like a field trip. But it was a sleep over. So I remember we’re in this gym and signed up for this. I take my you know, my sleeping bag and everything. They had got popcorn and everything for the kids was like a movie night. And and asleep over. But the movie was Gremlins. And I remember being like, no, this is scary. And I ended up calling my parents I was like, Nah, come pick me up. I’m done with this shit.

Mikko Miller 22:51
Yeah, who watches grim? Little kids? Man? I mean, at that time, it was scary as fuck. I mean, we were like, what, five, six years old at that time? Yeah, I

Calvin Tilokee 22:59
was. Yeah, I mean, just sad to be around that age. Yeah. Yeah.

Steve 23:04
What a freak.

Mikko Miller 23:06
Yeah. Remember Michael Jackson.

Calvin Tilokee 23:07
here we Go again. I don’t think Michael brecker comes in one way or another.

Steve 23:25
Toys, you know.

Calvin Tilokee 23:28
You don’t want him sliding down your chimney.

Mikko Miller 23:38
I’m not going to. I refuse

Calvin Tilokee 23:42
are these milk and cookies for me? Let’s let’s try to have a wholesome episode.

Mikko Miller 23:54
Let’s do it. Let’s do it. Let’s do it.

Calvin Tilokee 23:57
Alright, so one thing that came up in our conversation about getting this quality content for y’all on this episode. is a holiday parties. Do we think they’ll come back? And do we have any interesting holiday party stories from our work times? Feel This is gonna be? Yeah, this is gonna be a wider conversation. Yeah.

Mikko Miller 24:21
Let’s go fast. I’ll go on a limb and say it will come back only because people are having parties now and they’re not supposed to you so imagine, you know, when things open up, I can only imagine people just gonna go buck wild. And the second part of your question wild or actually, let’s let’s come back around to that because I don’t want to. Yeah, I don’t want to blow up my boss’s spot just yet.

Steve 24:53
Yeah, I agree. I think they’re gonna come back. Everybody wants to get back to normal. Next year is going to be a big year for travel. and leisure industries. And I think parties by Christmas time, they’ll probably come back in some way shape or form, at least the Christmas party will because at that point, you’ll have herd immunity to a degree. So yeah, I’m, I’m in agreement with you, man.

Calvin Tilokee 25:17
Yeah, I think so too. And I agree with your explanation of, you know, in some some way or form, I’m not sure that they’re going to look exactly like they have in the past. But right, I think, yeah. But by then, I mean, I’m praying, you know, our industry gets back on, on its feet, some level, and there’ll be something. But it’s interesting on our ref bar growth page this week, we actually asked the question, people actually missed these holiday parties. And it was a resounding like, 90%. Nope, like people don’t even miss. Like going through them. Which I thought was interesting. It was really interesting. What about like, do you guys miss those work? parties are not

Steve 25:55
No. No.

Calvin Tilokee 25:56
Okay.

Mikko Miller 25:58
Not at all. And big? Hell no. For me, I couldn’t explain. No, for me.

Steve 26:06
I’ve always I’ve never been able to fully relax at a holiday party. And, you know, you start getting into these weird situations where, I mean, the one holiday, the one holiday party I went to, it was from my old software company, I’ve talked about them before. And all the nonsense that went on there. Now you get all these motherfuckers drinking, and everyone looks dressed up, it was a black tie thing. And we were at the museum in Chicago, they rented out the entire thing. And they had these DJs and all the bullshit that you would expect, you know, someone to bring in like that. And everywhere I go, everybody is is still no one’s relaxed. Everyone’s just, you’re either drinking or you’re politicking. Or I got offered Coke, like five times. You know,

I got I got offered coke twice. At the pre party. You know, my boss had a party at a bar, we go to the bar, a golfer got offered coke. The first time I didn’t even take my coat off. Finally, I take my coat off and then someone else comes. Hey, Rudolph, you wanna party? Get the fuck out of here. I just know.

Calvin Tilokee 27:15
Talk about hospitality.

Mikko Miller 27:17
It was crazy. Man. Jesus. Yeah.

Calvin Tilokee 27:18
pass it around, like hors d’oeuvres. It was,

Steve 27:22
it was bananas. It really was. Yeah, so I’m no, I’m not gonna fucking miss it. I’ll go to them. You know if we have them. But I’m fortunate that I can work remote. So I don’t I don’t anticipate going to one.

Calvin Tilokee 27:35
Yeah, I you know, I don’t miss him either. And I’ll say this, but I don’t miss the actual hotel party. So like, the individual hotels that we work that those I can I never really could kind of let loose it those anyway. Because, you know, I’m, I’m a director. So you have employees? And yeah, you know, you know, you can be showing your asset these kind of parties. Yeah, you know, you got to really, you got to keep a button. Yeah. Yeah, that’s the thing. People forget that, you know, people forget that these are still work events, you know, and some people, they either, you know, if they’re not in a management position, you may not have people reporting to you. So you don’t even think about it that way. But like, these are work events, man, like this should still come back to you on Monday.

Steve 28:19
Yeah. As you’re saying that the company I worked at, there was a lot of young people there right out of college, and a lot of the young women were just showing their ass all over the place. This one chick, I remember, she wasn’t wearing anything under. And like it was clearly showing that she wasn’t wearing anything under and she was the talk of the entire I need to argue it’s the hardcore man. It was not real coke naked. But like, you come into the office the next day is like, you know, yeah, you have to own that. Yeah, yeah, kind of place

Calvin Tilokee 28:54
it so I remember there was one holiday party I was at it was for you know, this this hotels working at at the time. And this girl and it wasn’t nothing like your Steve like like that person. She She was just having a good time, right dancing a lot. But she was sweating profusely. And she was wearing a grey dress. And it was like fitted. And you just saw this huge, like puddle of sweat going on back. And yeah, I mean, it’s not our fault, really. But it’s still like, she was remembered for that. She was called back sweat for like months.

Mikko Miller 29:36
Wow.

Calvin Tilokee 29:38
People were just calling him back sweat. You know, like, yo, what’s, what’s the name of a worker at the front desk? Not back sweat. Oh,yeah, yeah. Yeah,

Steve 29:47
that’s so unfortunate.

Calvin Tilokee 29:49
It is. Yeah, I felt bad. Because it was not like she intended to be memorable that night. You know, it’s not like she put on something like, you know, like, like your person with Oh, hey, you can see it. Everything or I’m wearing something revealing. And I want you to you know, remember me this way. She just unfortunately what around color? I guess you know go into black dress? Yeah.

Steve 30:12
Well that’s just I mean, maybe she doesn’t go to clubs enough use gotta yeah you wear black and kind of dance. I know I sweat like a bastard like I could sweat through a suit of armor I know to wear black

Calvin Tilokee 30:26
rustling up your robot over?

Steve 30:28
tell you man, Wd 40 on my ass quick. Spraying route.

Mikko Miller 30:39
Know what’s bad dude? Yeah, my boss would get shit faced drunk in the department that I used to work at. And just call people out. And like, you know, below, I don’t even know why they hired you like, like that kind of stuff. And people didn’t take her seriously because they knew she was drunk, you know. But like, that kind of stuff made me iffy. Where I’m just like, Calvin, I don’t feel comfortable to just let loose in that kind of environment. Plus, the kind of staff that we had, at that time, were very petty. They would look for any excuse to take a photo of you so that they’d have that momento and use it against you. And this happened with my what our big boss at that time, she got shit faced drunk, passed out, and people took photos over. Because her I think her skirt kind of went up in her underwear was showing and she just passed out on the dance floor. And I think there’s a reason why some of these people are working in my department. Because, you know, she’d be like, Oh, I’m gonna, like, let you go or whatever. And they’d be like, Ah, look at this photo right here. You know? Yeah, yeah, exactly. blackmail shit. So never, I would never go to a work party like that ever again.

Calvin Tilokee 31:57
No, that’s crazy. So yeah, like I was saying earlier, so we had a party for like the individual hotel you would work at. And those are the both ones he always kind of stayed buttoned up. But those never really, you know, let loose, really. But for like, for our revenue team, they would always do something, right. And a lot of the times it was that in the year convention we went to in Vegas, that was always the second week of December. So that kind of was like our de facto holiday party for the whole company. And everybody there is on the same level, you know, so you didn’t go to fuck off. You know? But there was there was one time you know, we’re all hanging out at the nightclub at Caesars, I think is called pure now. Okay. Um, yeah, so we had this, we had this nightclub, they rented out the whole nightclub for for the conference. So it was like, just you and your colleagues and people from around the country in the travel industry. So it’s like, you know, DJ, if everything’s crazy drinks, open bar, we’re getting fucked up having a good time party. And then all of a sudden, somebody taps me on the shoulder, and just points up to the second level. And I look up, and this other girl who’s another director in our company, she is like, sucking face with this dude. everybody’s like, Oh,

Steve 33:12
shit, you know, on the second floor, so everyone can see her?

Calvin Tilokee 33:15
Well, no, no. Well, she know to in her defense, she went up there so she wouldn’t be seen. So like, all of us were on the dance floor, almost on the dance floor and everything. So but there was like another level up there. So she figured, hey, I’m gonna go up another level when nobody’s at. Sure. But she, I guess she wasn’t thinking straight. Because she was like, right, right, better railing. So it’s like, yeah, we can see if you have taken five steps back we probably wouldn’t have but you’re right by the railing so we notice you. And it was it wasn’t that big a deal. Like it wasn’t like a blackmail type ship. But that story followed her for a while. It was kind of like, how was Vegas? look like? You had a good? Yeah.

Mikko Miller 33:57
She went up to get down.

Calvin Tilokee 34:05
Hey, you know, it was it was that line from from the hangover? Like, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. So for herpes, I should have

Mikko Miller 34:20
loved that.

Steve 34:21
Because a good good actor.

Calvin Tilokee 34:23
Yeah, yeah. But no Mika. You reminded me of this other time. So we did. It wasn’t a holiday party, but we did an outing to to the Poconos. So they rented a couple of houses at this resort, just the revenue team again. So we got there got there in the day and it was like, yet volleyball, people could go paddleboarding and just all kinds of shit. There was like really cool, but then that night, we did dinner, and then they were like, Listen, we’re all going to head up to one house, do a bonfire and drink and party fun like we do. So like Okay, cool. But nobody was really drinking until that party, right so we did dinner, maybe somebody had a Be able to but yeah, like, that wasn’t drinking, like, you know, we get fucked up together. So right, we get to the bonfire, which was the first part of this this thing. So nobody’s really had anything to drink it, except two people, apparently. So this one girl sitting right next to me and on the other side of her is like the Senior VP of revenue, she’s like number two in the company, right? So she’s like everybody’s boss, if you’re working in this company and you’re in revenue, she interviewed you, you know. So she’s sitting right next to her. And this girl sipping from you know, like one of those stainless steel, you know, like a water bottle type. Like, like, Oh, I’m only describing it because of the size of this thing is like a 20 ounce, you know, thing. And she keeps sipping it, but we don’t know what she sip and then all of a sudden, she just starts like, talking shit about people. In No, I just like just like Mikko stories, I’m sitting there just being quiet. And what we were doing is everybody’s going around fire just kind of saying, what who they were what hotel they came from, and just a little background, you know, whatever, getting to know everybody. And she starts talking shit after that. Everybody says something she’s like, you know, like, why are you talking so much? You know, why are you saying so much? And then I look it out the corner of my eye and then I see my, my VP and she looks at me and she’s like, she Okay, like Mauldin to me. I’m like, I have no idea. Like, she seems drunk. And we’re talking about her across her and she’s not she doesn’t even catch it. So I’m like, Yeah, she’s definitely fucked up.

Mikko Miller 36:33
Oh.

Calvin Tilokee 36:35
So then on top of that, this other dude, Indian dude, he gets up, and he’s about to put his hand in the bonfire. That’s how drunk he is.

Steve 36:44
oh shit

Calvin Tilokee 36:45
Right? It’s you know, I mean, I was talking about putting a fire together earlier this week. There are times when you can grab a piece of wood like at the ends and it’s not really that hot and like move it right but this wasn’t one of them times this shit was like orange man like it was on fire. You know? So somebody put his hands in it. Somebody had to grab like, whoa, whoa. And then he strikes the person off and then it looks at a completely different girl. Across the fire and says you’re a bitch. sitting there like Yo, how wit I was just don’t find it like how did you get this drunk this early in the night where the fuck we out drinking? Because everybody was out there paddleboarding, playing volleyball, you know, we went to a shooting range. Oh, fuck is like tip line and shit. Like, when did y’all get drunk? I must admit,

Mikko Miller 37:43
BYOB

Calvin Tilokee 37:44
and I just. Yeah, I just remember at one point in the night, these two people were speaking to each other. So this girl who was then my buddy Shut up. And this guy who called the girl a bitch, they’re talking to each other. And the Indian guy. He had a very heavy accent sober is kind of hard to understand him, you know? And then the other girl slurring. And I just, I’m just looking at this from a distance, and I noticed the person next to me, I was like, yo, you know that conversation needs subtitles, right. So people just forget these work events. Yeah, you know,

Mikko Miller 38:24
for real,

Steve 38:25
you know, and I get when you know, younger people fuck up and make that mistake, but when you see older people make that mistake. Jesus, it’s, it’s something else.

Calvin Tilokee 38:37
No, that’s, that’s true. That’s that’s a good point. You could almost absolve a younger person for it. You know, like, first time you may not know better, but these people were way too old to be doing

Mikko Miller 38:50
this do you see a younger girl in the department like stripping down? You’re just like, yeah, she’s young. She doesn’t know any better see older lady. for 30 years. He’s like 20 year old 40 year old. That’s your man’s Teddy.

Calvin Tilokee 39:25
moseby tuber like actually that same nightclub situation? So you bought it? I think it was the same night. I just I’m walking off the dance floor to go to the bathroom. And I just see this older couple making out and they did didn’t have the good sense to go to the second floor. They were on the dance floor like right off the dance floor making out and I mean, these people are like 50 some. Yeah. And just reminded me of the Chris Rock, you know, not really old, but just too old to be at the club.

Steve 39:53
Yeah.

Calvin Tilokee 39:56
And if I don’t get that geriatric shit out here, take it back to your room. Do you want to see that shit, man?

Mikko Miller 40:03
Fuck around and break a hip.

Steve 40:04
Can you bring up a good point though? Huh? When are you going to be too old to go to the club? Oh,

Calvin Tilokee 40:12
I think I’m too old to go to a club now.

Mikko Miller 40:14
Yeah. 35 I think to be honest, that was it for me Get it?

Steve 40:20
Now, I get like the spoons, clubs and all that shit. But like, would you go and get bottle service at a nicer club?

Calvin Tilokee 40:28
Well, okay, describe a nicer club. Like, what did you mean?

Steve 40:31
I don’t I mean, you know, there’s clubs like, I guess what the tunnel or Limelight used to be. And then there’s, you know, yo. And then there’s, I don’t know, whatever high end clubs there are. But would you go to like a nice club and, you know, get bottle service and just chill out?

Calvin Tilokee 40:49
Yeah, I mean, I could see myself doing that. You know, I actually, the first time I ever went to Vegas and did that kind of thing. I was probably 35. Okay, so at that point, I had already felt like, I’d never been to Vegas period before that, right. So I never really at that black. I felt like I had missed my Vegas window. I felt like Vegas is like your early 20s, early to mid 20s kind of thing. And I never did it. So by the time I got to that age, you know, whatever. You know, I don’t know how much I’m like Vegas. I was completely wrong. I fucking loved it. But I still love it. Because I was like, I don’t really gamble. And even now, when I do go, I’ll go with a couple 100 bucks for a couple of days. Like I’m not a huge Gambler, but I do enjoy it. But it’s not like I live without it right now. It’s like my oven days are over. I’m not doing that. You know, I was like, Hey, I’m going for a conference. It’d be fun. You know. So your work peeps. So I like over the end. I’ve gone every year since then up until now. I look forward to that. It’s two days out of the whole year. I got a lot of time to rest and get ready for that. Yeah, but I enjoy it because the people you’re there with you basically know everyone at the club, right? So it’s you either know them personally, or you know that they’re there for the conference. So there’s no drama, there’s no yo yo, yo, you spilled a drink on my shoes. Sure, you know, none of that kind of shit. So like I in that context. I still enjoy the club scene. Like, I close that shut down. I never leave before it’s over. That’s it though. Until 4am asked Mikko Oh, yeah, that’s I Mikko came up to see me. I was like, yo, when did you just done I can’t see you ever for me. You know? I’m sorry. You know,

Mikko Miller 42:33
true story.

Calvin Tilokee 42:34
Yeah. So I mean, I enjoy it a lot. But in the right context, you know, I’m not just gonna go to a club. Like if you if you all said hey, let’s go to Vegas this weekend. I’m going but I’m not going to Tao until 3am because it’s, you don’t know what and people it’s a completely different scene. I’m not into it like that. Yeah, but, but to say yeah, like three of us go to like say like a whiskey bar and we sit

Mikko Miller 42:59
Yeah, lounge get a lounge.

Steve 43:02
lounge.

Mikko Miller 43:04
I agree. I’m old. I’m too old to be going to be little towel with these little Asians all hyped up on some shit dance to some loud music for these uptight guys. I just want to fight it every fucking second when you like bump shoulders with them. It’s a fucking crowded club. Killer fuck. Yeah, exactly. I have no tolerance for shit like that. So my as we get into a fight, even at this stage, even worse, my fucking I have a hair trigger. Right now. You know? Yeah, look at me wrong. I’m coming at you. And it’s like it’s not a scene for me. You know the loud music hall. I can do less with that. A lounge a cigar club? whiskey bar. Fuck Starbucks with some fucking coffee and some cigars. I’m there. But now, I can’t do clubs. Gotcha.

Calvin Tilokee 43:54
You know, it’s funny, Mikko I was I always tell people when you know, had the idea for starting this podcast with you. And like when I described you two guys, I was telling the story about you Mikko is the time I came out to Long Beach and we were chillin. We remember we went to get like that bubble tea. Yeah, you went to that spot. We get bubble tea, which I had for the first time we sat there for three hours crying a fuckup and I was like, we were going off bubble tea.

Mikko Miller 44:22
I know

Calvin Tilokee 44:23
there was alcohol and we run out at a club you know, getting drunk taking shots like we don’t need much right?

Mikko Miller 44:31
Right. Yeah, no, you’re talking shit over fucking bubble tea with some tapioca pearls in there. Exactly. Going off. Exactly.

Steve 44:43
Good living back up. Yeah,

Calvin Tilokee 44:45
man. So but yeah, you know, those of you listened in any of you guys got a nice lounge you want us to come to maybe do a live podcast over Ooh, bottle of bourbon. Fucking, we’d be up for that. Oh, hit us up. Okay, Sup? This this vaccines coming out so you know we could travel? Well, yeah. I don’t even care.

Steve 45:06
I’d be down for that.

Mikko Miller 45:07
Yeah, I’d be dead. I’d be down for that. I’d be down for that. That’d be fucking cool.

Calvin Tilokee 45:13
All right. Speaking of drinks, this was the question. This one may lead to more debate. eggnog Yes or no? No.

Mikko Miller 45:30
No, it’s done right now.

Steve 45:35
And you know that I sprinkled a little cinnamon and nutmeg on top of that. Good stuff. Okay, fancy. That’s the whiskey to it. Had a Little whiskey to it and stuff.

Mikko Miller 45:45
Now is that typical? I’m not I’m not an eggnog kind of sore. So is that typical with cinnamon and whiskey?

Steve 45:53
I don’t know about the cinnamon, but definitely the nutmeg. And I’ve had it with brandy. I’ve had it with whiskey. I’m drinking it with rye

Mikko Miller 46:00
from get technical. So not just eggnog by itself. It’s like a concoction is what you’re sipping on.

Steve 46:08
I myself am sipping on a concoction. But yeah, I just like drinking it. Straight up. I mean, I don’t on a hot day, or after doing something really exerting I don’t crave a thick fucking milkshake. But, you know,

Mikko Miller 46:25
if I’m having like anchorman

Steve 46:30
milk was a bad choice. It was a Yeah, it’s a if I’m having a cookie, I mean, cookies and eggnog go pretty well together.

Mikko Miller 46:41
Yeah. Okay.

Steve 46:43
I it’s something about the holidays. I gotta have eggnog.

Calvin Tilokee 46:46
I just, yeah.

Steve 46:47
What about you?

Calvin Tilokee 46:49
That’s a pretty traditional thing. So you have it the only way I would have it with some kind of alcohol and, you know, so we, in in Trinidad is basically the same thing, but we call it punche crema. Okay, it’s basically the same thing, but ours almost always has rum in it because we Caribbean and we put rum in everything if I could put alcohol and we will. So that’s really how I have it just on its own. I could take it or leave it. I mean, it’s not something I’m going to go for. If it’s just there, but you know, throw some rum in it. You know, now I know. Try it with some bourbon. I might do that. I would do that. But there’s other drinks. I would go for first, you know? Sure. I had to Google everything that’s in it you know to get ready for this episode because that wasn’t I’m not not too hip on the eggnog. So in case anybody doesn’t know what it is, or what’s in it. pedia says eggnog is a rich, chilled, sweetened, dairy based beverage. It’s traditionally made with milk, cream, sugar, whipped egg whites, and egg yolks, which gives it a frothy texture and its name so far, so without the alcohol. That should just sounds to me like you just need to add a cup of flour and throw it in the oven for at 350 for an hour and give me a cake. Yeah,

Mikko Miller 48:08
you know what if I want something warm, sweet and creamy going down my throat that shit better be a milkshake. Oh, yeah, you’ve made a quick lesson. Yeah, yeah. Awesome. wholesome, wholesome. Yeah, my holiday. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Calvin Tilokee 48:34
Oh, good. And no, that note that wraps up our episode of holidays. Episode. Let’s leave it there before we go too far. Exactly. But a reminder on this week’s show notes, we’re going to put in some links of things you should get for your loved ones for the holidays, or send it to us if you want. We just put some cool up there. You know, so you want to buy it for us? Who would take it we write that at all.

Mikko Miller 49:05
We should put a Christmas list up there.

Calvin Tilokee 49:08
Exactly. Right. But now it’s time for

Mikko Miller 49:16
the holidays. Christmas shopping is kind of nuts. COVID has made people go into a frenzy. carjackers. People are going to a target and steal shit off of your cart because they didn’t get there early enough. Or they didn’t look around enough or they couldn’t find the stuff and they just jack shit out of your cart. People jack Pokemon cards out of my cart. And I’m just like, you know, one, they’re always sold out. I get it. It’s never available. I understand that. But I took my asked to target early to get a couple. And I don’t appreciate what someone comes by and swipes two out of the three boxes that I personally pulled off the shelf and Then now there’s none. So carjackers get your own shit. Car jacking is wack. It’s stealing go to store early next time and stop stealing shit. That’s fucked up to nice way of saying

Steve 50:14
that’s lame. It is. It’s, that’s silly. Man. This.

Mikko Miller 50:21
Yeah, you know, it’s a rare thing and Pokemon cards are like frickin decrees I get it and it’s never available. I understand that but get your own shit. You know, fucking up my day.

Calvin Tilokee 50:39
So mine is, is called a recipe for seduction. Have you guys heard of this? No. Okay, well prepared to have your mind blown. So, a recipe. a recipe for seduction is a Lifetime movie that came out this week about the love life of Colonel Sanders.

Mikko Miller 51:11
Go watch

Steve 51:11
that kid from Saved by the Bell. Yes,

Calvin Tilokee 51:13
yes. So it’s starring Mario Lopez. Ah, so if anybody ever wondered what the Colonel’s love life was like, Is it spicy? extra crispy, slow roasted. And now we call find out. And that get off my lawn part is the motherfuckers who made this movie I already hate show. Or wasting my time because I am definitely watching this. Right? So I hate jail in advance for wasting my goddamn time with this movie because this is a movie about a white Southern man making black food played by a Mexican. Sign me the fuck up

Mikko Miller 51:59
Jesus. Fuck I gotta watch it now. God damn it was the shit now?

Calvin Tilokee 52:10
Man, I’m watching the hell out of it. I might have to DVR that shit. I already know I’m gonna watch this multiple times. And I’m mad about it.

Mikko Miller 52:21
In your popcorn, all aggressive and yet Fuck this. Yeah.

Steve 52:27
When I started seeing commercials for it, I thought it was just some clever marketing that they had no clear example. Then when I saw the time slot. It’s genius.

Calvin Tilokee 52:41
No, it is it is. It’s like it’s just what are these things? It’s like trash TV, but it’s a fucking train wreck. How could you not watch that? Right? Could you not watch that? Come on.

Mikko Miller 52:54
Me. Does that mean AC Slater is on his last fucking leg in entertainment. If he’s reduced down to fucking hosts are narrating.

Calvin Tilokee 53:03
No, no, no, no, no, he’s in it. He’s playing Colonel Sanders. Oh, this is like a movie.

Mikko Miller 53:09
It’s a movie. Yeah, worse. He’s

Steve 53:14
into the trailer.

Calvin Tilokee 53:15
The trailer it is ridiculous.

Mikko Miller 53:17
Oh Mike. I thought he was like Samuel L Jackson in that shit. Like, you know, Naira? No, no, I got it. Oh, he’s in it.

Calvin Tilokee 53:24
No, no, he is playing a white man from Louisville Kentucky.

Steve 53:33
If I remember correctly didn’t like the poster have him in like the Colonel Sanders shirt with no sleeves Am I making that up?

Calvin Tilokee 53:44
No, you’re not you know shit. Yeah, no.

Mikko Miller 53:48
Colonel Sanders has in hand and they so they picked a Mexican Yeah.

Steve 53:55
They wanted this to match the the

Mikko Miller 53:59
I got a Google Sheet now Fuck it. I’m good. I’m gonna you guys are gonna hear some frickin What’s it called?

Calvin Tilokee 54:07
Just a recipe for seduction.

Mikko Miller 54:12
Right. Swedish meatballs.

Calvin Tilokee 54:21
He does. He’s got on short sleeves and

Steve 54:29
oh my god.

Mikko Miller 54:30
Oh, what the fuck Really? They try to make them look all sexy shorts. You got the hero pepper. Oh, but why?

Steve 54:45
Try to make them look like

Calvin Tilokee 54:46
that ain’t Harland Sanders that’s Mario Lopez.

Mikko Miller 54:55
Oh, why?

Calvin Tilokee 54:58
Oh boy. Yep. Yep 2020 yo 20 fucking

Mikko Miller 55:05
stupid. Yeah, I’m watching this shit. I’m watching

Steve 55:13
sweet. I found my get off the lawn. It’s something similar to me cuz there’s been just reading in the local news today which I’ve been watching a lot more local news now since doing this with you guys. Someone’s stolen three Amazon trucks area with all kinds of shit on them, right? I think in porch piracy to the next level.

Mikko Miller 55:34
Yeah,

Steve 55:35
you know your packages. I know that shit off man I’m expecting stuff you know? Yeah, really? That’s crazy so many people’s days now because you want to be a greedy little quick pitch.

Calvin Tilokee 55:51
Well you didn’t say you didn’t say Friday after next was on your list before? Yeah, right.

Steve 56:01
And that crackhead goes data. I got me a data jersey. Oh, this is lost my shit. I don’t know why wait, where the guy says it. It just it kills me every time.

Calvin Tilokee 56:13
Oh man. Yeah, that that movie’s ridiculous. For real. Oh, man. All right, time for mine is Norwegian Cruise Lines. Whoa, they have commercials out now. Have you guys seen this? They do. I’ve seen them. There’s a new marketing campaign commercials for Norwegian Cruise Lines. Who the fuck is getting on a cruise? It’s during a pandemic? Like when are you selling a ticket for? Where are you going? Where are you going to dock the ship? I mean, yeah, it’s a great idea. Let’s put 1000s of people in an enclosed space during a pandemic. Because y’all had to shit so great before a pandemic right like we all forgotten about when one person gets the runs on a cruise ship. Everybody’s everybody’s got it? Yep. You know, I mean, wow, talk about brazen. I mean props to whoever that marketing person is because you must be projecting for like 2022 maybe. Maybe it was cheap now we got this money sitting in the marketing budget. You might as well do some

Mikko Miller 57:18
I don’t care if it’s free. I’m not getting not. No, no.

Calvin Tilokee 57:21
So whoever greenlit that marketing campaign, I don’t like that jerk.

Steve 57:27
There you go.

Calvin Tilokee 57:30
No data. No vaccines in the world.

Mikko Miller 57:32
Yeah, but mine is whoever cast did Mario Lopez for Who the fuck is you? Know,

Calvin Tilokee 57:48
I feel like I feel like it’s a love hate situation. Like,

Mikko Miller 57:50
like, I hate you. But Damn, I’m

Calvin Tilokee 57:53
glad you did it.

Mikko Miller 57:54
You know? Like you couldn’t find enough white guys to play that part. I don’t get it.

Calvin Tilokee 58:03
Don’t get the seven herbs and spices.

Mikko Miller 58:07
I’m looking at the fucking movie poster and it’s fucking irritating the shit out of me right? It’s literally like pissing me the fuck off right now. Oh my god. And the sleeveless shirt. The sleeve.

Calvin Tilokee 58:28
I don’t know why I didn’t bring this out at Halloween. Cuz this is definitely if y’all if y’all just like this Halloween. I won’t be. This is my like, three.

Steve 58:37
I got a confession. Okay, I got a confession. KFC has been doing some weird shit for a while now. And I got sucked up into it. About two weeks before Halloween. I saw this thing it was a fire log like a Firestarter log. Mm hmm. That had the 11 herbs and spices in it. It’s a KFC firelog and I thought oh fuck yeah, I’m gonna I’m gonna go nutty and I bought for those bitches. And for heaven. We ended up having an opportunity to burn one and I got it and I was all excited. You know, exciting. I’m going to be smelling fried chicken. I thought there’s gonna be and I don’t smell I don’t smell anything. I was asking people I go Do you smell anything? They go sounds like fucking wood. Steve. Sounds like you’re not getting anything out of this. Guy’s like me. You know what? KFC is I don’t like that jerk. Whoever came up with these firelogs that’s that’s my I don’t like that jerk. you fuckers developed a great mousetrap. You got me to click on a fucking banner. And I bought it. bought four of them. Just my ass.

Mikko Miller 59:55
Imagine all those 1000s of black families sitting around disappointed after buying

Calvin Tilokee 1:00:09
Gotta get the whole package instead of

Steve 1:00:13
like, too much.

Mikko Miller 1:00:20
Oh my god. Oh shit I get. Yeah.

Calvin Tilokee 1:00:28
Oh man. All right now it’s time for

Mikko Miller 1:00:37
This week’s host Mikko eats all right. All right. All right. All right. All right. This should be a really really really simple question Who’s gonna be my contestant? I guess.

Calvin Tilokee 1:00:51
But it’s my turn. I haven’t. So,

Mikko Miller 1:00:54
all right. All right. food related this simple question hard answer. So if you get this props to you, man. All right. originally introduced in 1912, which is the top selling cookie in the United States.

Calvin Tilokee 1:01:14
1912 top selling cookie. Oreo?

Mikko Miller 1:01:20
Hey, yes, sir. Smart motherfucker. That’s right. Check out the big brains on Cal. Ah smart money. Yeah, man. originally introduced in 1912 Oreos, which traditionally featured a cream filling sandwich between two chocolate wafers now comes in many different varieties. top selling us cookie. Nice dude. Nice.

Calvin Tilokee 1:01:50
Dunk that shit in some eggnog. Do

Mikko Miller 1:01:52
you got a nice? Actually, that might be good though. Cuz the sweet cream with that. That’d probably be really good. Yeah.

Calvin Tilokee 1:02:02
Yeah, I think so. I think so. We might have to. We have to agree that one.

Mikko Miller 1:02:07
Can you drink eggnog if you’re lactose intolerant? Probably not. Right, but I was like nobody suggested. But yeah, see.

Steve 1:02:15
be in the same room.

Mikko Miller 1:02:16
Definitely a no for me. Definitely.

Calvin Tilokee 1:02:22
Yeah, I wouldn’t fuck with that. Alright, now it’s time for the Chris Rock quote of the week. Mine is you know the holidays. You know about you buying gifts, people so the one where he was talking about you ever get somebody cracked GIF? Hey, like you shouldn’t have route 95 why cuz

Mikko Miller 1:02:54
I like that. You shouldn’t have I didn’t got it from cracking should end on that note, man. Mine’s not funny at all. Mine is not fun at all.

Calvin Tilokee 1:03:07
All right, cool. Cool. So shout outs this week. Shout out is a little bit different. But I want to shout out a big fan of ours, Jennifer Suski, who just messaged me today and telling me that she finally got pregnant after three years of infertility treatment. So congratulations. Really happy for you. That is gratulations Congrats. That’s Yeah, that’s a big deal. So really happy for Jennifer and her husband and it’s a great time to find out to run the holiday. So much love to you. Congratulations. And she also told me, you know, the fact that it took three years she spent over 60 grand on infertility treatments and stuff, right? Like that kid better pay for their own college. I’m done after that.

Mikko Miller 1:03:52
Kid Yeah, man.

Calvin Tilokee 1:03:54
That kid is born you in debt by you and get no car you ain’t get no college education. I’m done. You supposed to be free. Thanks. It was a patient for that part of it.

Mikko Miller 1:04:10
But seriously, congrats. That’s that’s that’s a major deal because it is expensive. Trust me, because we’re going through that right now. And it’s it’s, it’s fucking it’s a wreck on your pockets for sure.

Steve 1:04:19
If anybody out there is going through that. I recommend trying to put it on a credit card and opening up a credit card to do it. Because then you get the miles. That’s what my wife and I did. Because again, we adopted you got all the points. And we got an Italian vacation out of that.

Mikko Miller 1:04:35
Oh, yeah, go? Yeah, no, it’s

Steve 1:04:37
no joke.

Calvin Tilokee 1:04:38
There. Yeah, no, I’m sure bro. Yeah, I mean, obviously I’m joking around. But yeah, that’s that’s that’s some serious stuff that people are dealing with. And big news. Good news for Jennifer. Fantastic

Steve 1:04:49
that it came through. And thank you for listening.

Mikko Miller 1:04:52
Yeah, yes. See, for all you infertile people. listen to the podcast. We’ll knock you guys up.

You’re welcome. You’re welcome.

Calvin Tilokee 1:05:15
Oh, yeah, we do sometimes just got to know when to go out on a high so outro time. This is Calvin, aka Revparblems aka revpartravels, rapid growth revparblems.com and if you want to know how I do it at revparmedia

Mikko Miller 1:05:32
and this is Mikko to Filipino, you’ll find me on Instagram as Mikko underscore eats. slat up in my dm, please.

Steve 1:05:41
Hey, and this is Steve. You can hear me every week with Cal and Mikko on the midlife crisis podcast.

Calvin Tilokee 1:05:45
All right, thank you for joining us on another episode of midlife crisis podcast. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please leave us a review on iTunes and spread the holiday spirit until a friend see what we’re up to in between episodes on Instagram at midlife crisis podcast show notes for this and all episodes are available on midlife crisis podcast comm where you can also sign up for the mailing list, drop us a note, let us know what topics you’d like us to discuss. Thanks for tuning in, and we’ll catch on the next one.

Mikko Miller 1:06:15
Let’s go

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