Calvin Tilokee 0:02
Hello and welcome to the midlife crisis podcast. I’m your host Calvin, also known as Revparblems on Instagram. I’m excited to do this talk show with my best friends from high school and college. Steve and Mikko, what can you expect on this podcast? Well, I like to call it a talk show for Men of a Certain Age. We’re not quite old. But we’re the kind of guys that have to make sure we don’t mix our alcohol on a night out, you know, we’ll chat about current events, trending topics, and things that we just need to get on our soapbox about knowing us. We’ll be laughing the whole time. And ladies, don’t worry if you ever wanted to know what your husband or boyfriend talks about in the man cave. Stick around. Now, keep in mind, we’re old enough to remember when Parental Advisory stickers went on CDs. If you don’t know what CDs are. You’re too young for this podcast. Speaking of which, make sure you have your headphones in. It’s NSFW as these kids say. We’ll be bringing that flavor to your weekly on your way to work while you’re shaving. Or just sitting around wondering why your back hurts but let’s get this show on the road. Hello and welcome to midlife crisis podcast. I’m your host Calvin here as always with my boy Stev and Mikko, bringing that flavor to ear on a weekly basis. On today’s episode, we’ll get you all ready for Thanksgiving. Of course, you hear our Chris Rock quote of the week. I don’t like that jerk. And get off my lawn. But first, how was the week fellas.

Mikko Miller 1:20
You know what? I was just talking to Steve about this earlier the week was fantabulous I two things, two things. I went to a winery to celebrate a birthday for a fan of ours actually she, her and her man listen to our show religiously. So happy birthday. Naomi. Addison. Thank you guys for listening. Yeah, we spent a day at the winery with them had some food, brunch, you know, did the whole spiel. And then the other thing was, did a raffle for a donation giveaway to the No Kid Hungry program where they provide meals for children that are otherwise not getting any meals throughout the day. They provide breakfast lunches after school meals for kids that need especially during the pandemic and we were able to raise $650 which is equivalent to about 6500 meals that are provided for these children. So I want to thank my IG community for helping out with that.

Calvin Tilokee 2:20
That’s fantastic, man. That sounds Thank you. There it is. And then we’ll send us the links and stuff. We’ll put that in the show notes for anybody listening that may want to donate. Sounds great.

Mikko Miller 2:32
Okay, you got it.

Calvin Tilokee 2:33
I see the Thanksgiving episodes off to a great start so wholesome.

Mikko Miller 2:37
That’s right who said we weren’t wholesome.

Calvin Tilokee 2:40
Exactly. Like dude from The Wire shhiiiiiitt.

Steve 2:57
I’ve been meaning to go back and binge watch that.

Calvin Tilokee 3:00
Great Show. Yeah, me too

Steve 3:02
scene where him and the other guy are just saying Fuck, and they’re using connotation possible. One of the best scenes ever

Calvin Tilokee 3:16
Oh, for sure. Absolutely.

Steve 3:18
had a really good week gave. Give a good presentation during an important meeting was good. And I finished a table that I was building.

Calvin Tilokee 3:30
Nice.

Steve 3:31
I sent you guys a picture of it. I built our dining room table. I’ve been getting into building shit. Since getting this house and the dining room table. I think it looks pretty good.

Mikko Miller 3:43
You have a way with wood sir. No, no pun intended.

Calvin Tilokee 3:53
Listen, I do you uh, definitely the handiest dude

Steve 3:58
My caulk game is strong. So strong. No, Wiggles, no bubbles.

Calvin Tilokee 4:10
It’s all nice. Smooth.

Steve 4:12
Steady, smooth, straight.

Calvin Tilokee 4:13
You gotta stay

Steve 4:15
sexy as shit hands like a surgeon.

Calvin Tilokee 4:25
Oh, love it. I can’t top none of that shit. But now just the week. I’m not sure about y’all. This week felt long. It feels like forever since we recorded and it’s been a week.

Mikko Miller 4:40
Yeah, that’s true. Yeah, it felt like been like two weeks almost.

Calvin Tilokee 4:45
Yeah, I don’t know if it’s because the week before the week leading up to our last episode was all the election stuff and maybe it just felt like, you know, a let down after that, you know, kind of coming off of that tension, but it felt like a long week, but this weekend was good man. We, we just watched a lot of movies, my wife found some account where they just recommended a bunch of movies. And we watch Okay, every single one of them was good. We watched last night we something called Searching. Have you guys seen that?

Mikko Miller 5:15
No,

Steve 5:16
who’s in it?

Calvin Tilokee 5:16
No? It’s with Debra Messing. And I don’t know the name of the lead actor, but I believe he was. Asian guy on LOST. I don’t know his name. I apologize. But it’s a good movie. It’s about his daughter goes missing. And it’s done in a really cool way. Because he’s trying to figure out where she is mainly through, like her computer and stuff. So a lot of the movie takes place like you’re looking at them type. So it’s not a movie, you can be on your phone and look away from.

Mikko Miller 5:47
I did see that I did see the social media thing.

Calvin Tilokee 5:51
Yeah. And it raises a so like, he’s talking to do the iPhone and stuff, mainly. And then she goes missing. So he’s trying to find her through there. And then he realizes he doesn’t know his daughter very well. He doesn’t know her friends. So he’s logging into her phone and her email to try to figure out who she was, you know, but it raises a lot of good points about I would say parenting and how it is these days. And

Mikko Miller 6:14
yeah, and who you live. You’re who you leave your kids with to with the brother scene or his

Calvin Tilokee 6:19
Yeah, exactly. Yeah, yeah. So anybody who hasn’t seen it, go out. Check it out. It’s a good movie. But uh, yeah, we watched a bunch of movies like that this weekend, and they were all hits. So it’s good. Nice. It’s always fulfilling when you put in a movie and at the end, you’re like, Huh, that was good. Not like a waste of time.

Mikko Miller 6:39
Yeah. Or when it sparks a discussion. Those are always good.

Steve 6:42
I haven’t seen that movie but the lead actor in that is the guy from Harold and Kumar, John Cho.

Calvin Tilokee 6:48
Oh, okay. Okay.

Mikko Miller 6:51
All asians look alike.

Calvin Tilokee 6:55
Coming from the black guy on the show.

Steve 6:59
JOHN Cho you kicked ass as Sulu in Star Trek reboot.

Mikko Miller 7:04
Yes, yes. He is listening right now.

Steve 7:08
Of course he’s listening to it.

Calvin Tilokee 7:09
He’s gonna hear one day. One day. Yeah. You know, I don’t recognize him. Like, I don’t he looks really different. Yes, he’s, and not in a bad way. Not to say that in a bad way. But he just he looks very mature. It doesn’t look like the guy from Harold and Kumar to me. That’s me trying to recover. Yeah. What was it? Yeah, it was a good movie. So shout out to Hohn Cho and everybody involved in Searching because that was a dope movie. And I really enjoyed it. But this week, getting you guys ready for Thanksgiving. So I figured we’d share some stories, talk about our favorite foods, things we’ve done over the years with family. And but I figured to lead in, we’ll talk a little history about the history of Thanksgiving, and most people know at least the basics. least I did. Right. I think most of us know. You know, the pilgrims and the Native Americans having a meal together, right? Apparently, this all came from the first harvest ever, that the pilgrims successfully pulled off. The Native Americans taught them how to harvest. The first time they did it, they said, hey, let’s throw a party and the last three days where they ate and broke bread together, which is pretty awesome. But in getting ready for this episode, what I found out, actually, to me was pretty interesting. I wanted to share this with you guys. In 1827, noted magazine editor and prolific writer, Sarah Josepha Hale, author of countless other things. The nursery rhyme Mary had a little lamb. And so the lady who wrote Mary had a little lamb launched a campaign to establish Thanksgiving as a national holiday for 36 years. years. She published numerous editorials and sent scores of letters to Governor’s senators, presidents and other politicians earning her the nickname The mother of Thanksgiving. Huh. Abraham Lincoln finally heeded her request in 1863 at the height of the Civil War. So she sounds like history’s first Karen Imagine writing a letter every.. 36 years to try to get something established as a holiday. Oh, my goodness. It’s a good thing. there wasn’t phones back then. Yo, They woulda had Alexander Graham Bell executed.

Mikko Miller 9:42
She must have wanted that party that bad

Calvin Tilokee 9:44
Yeah. Oh, my goodness. So then I had to Google because it would have just been ironic by the time it finally got made into a national holiday. She would have unfortunately passed away but she didn’t die until 1879. So she had about 14 years to enjoy. Thanks again. As a national holiday so we have heard of thank on Thanksgiving. There. You got the day off of work. You have Sarah Josepha Hale to thank for that. If you have kids, you may not be thanking her for Mary had a little lamb. But that’s another story. Oh, but yeah, let’s jump right into this conversation who’s hosting Thanksgiving this year? What are you guys doing?

Steve 10:22
So we were going to have at my parents house, but everybody was in agreement that if circumstances arise, we’re just not going to do it. And we’re now like, all doing a separate Thanksgiving on my parents side. On my wife’s side, we’re all still going to get together in a small, very small group. We have two relatives coming in off a plane. And they’re coming in with COVID tests, and they’re going to get tested once they’re here. And I say to themselves with a few days to get tested, and then come out

Calvin Tilokee 10:56
Where they traveling from?

Steve 10:57
Dallas.

Calvin Tilokee 10:59
Okay, okay.

Steve 11:00
But, you know, I still have my grandparents. And, you know, you got to put it out there, that anything you’re doing any behavior you an exhibit, should be in deference to, you know, the oldest person in your family that you’re going to be around? If you lock down stuff for my grandmother, who’s shit the woman’s 94-95

Calvin Tilokee 11:22
Oh, wow.

Steve 11:23
I mean, I’m kind of a dick for not knowing that right out of the gate, but she’s, you know, and she’s in she’s, like, incredibly sharp, you know, she’s nothing dull. Still gets around. And if you can’t lock down for, you know, a couple of short weeks, in order to see the woman shit, it’s, I mean, literally, she’s not gonna have a lot of these left. So if you just can’t do that, yeah.

Mikko Miller 11:46
I mean, that’s what we’re doing. My parents are still going to be in Maryland, they’re not going to come out here like they usually do to spend Thanksgiving with us. We were talking about maybe spending Thanksgiving with my in laws, but we may or may not it It all depends on if people are sick, if people are healthy, if certain family members are coming from out of town, and we don’t want to get exposed to those type of people. So we might just do like, husband and wife Thanksgiving, we’ve done it before. Where it’s just us two, we share a meal and we might visit the in laws for like an hour or two or three and then come back home. But it’s pretty much it. I mean, thanksgiving this year is pretty shit. So we’re just gonna leave it at that. And hopefully everyone goes home at the end of the night. safe and healthy stuff.

Calvin Tilokee 12:33
You know? Right. Right. So is your is your family fairly local to you? Like your in laws? Are you driving distance or anything? Yeah,

Mikko Miller 12:42
they’re about 25 minutes away. So that’s not so bad. No, okay. Yeah. Not bad at all.

Calvin Tilokee 12:48
I mean, that could be a blessing or a curse. To me, I look at it.

Mikko Miller 12:54
They might listen, blessing, blessing. Love you guys.

Calvin Tilokee 13:02
I gave you that alleyoop, man. And you dumped it. So kudos.

Mikko Miller 13:07
Thank you. stockton

Calvin Tilokee 13:09
that you got that you got. So I wanted to ask what age did you guys leave the kids table and join the adults?

Mikko Miller 13:16
Wow. I was a young because I grew up in Germany. So we didn’t have a lot of family members. So we didn’t have big gatherings. I believe I was 12 when I finally got out of the table with my brother, my little brother and his friend and his friend’s little sister, and I was asked to eat with the big folks, the grown folks. So I was about 12 years old.

Calvin Tilokee 13:40
Wow,young man.

Mikko Miller 13:41
Yeah, really yoyng. Yeah. But also, you know, we had like a table of like, 15. And it was only like 13 or 14 adults. So they were like, Hey, we need one more can’t have an empty seat. So I was like, the older one,

Calvin Tilokee 13:53
Got that early call up

Mikko Miller 13:57
Nice, right? That’s right. Off the minors

Calvin Tilokee 14:02
Literally.

Mikko Miller 14:07
Yes, yes.

Steve 14:11
I think I was around 14 because I ate so freakin much at that age. I just did not, you know, I just kicked the ass of everybody at the kids table. I won the pie contest all the time. And so it’s just because

Calvin Tilokee 14:28
I think for me, it was probably around roughly that same age. I mean, I don’t remember exactly, but I remember not really wanting to leave because when you were a kid, you got that Martinelli’s apple cider,

Mikko Miller 14:41
I suppose but Oh, yeah, he’s Elliot. Yeah.

Calvin Tilokee 14:45
Yeah. Martin Ellie’s is the ship. And remember the my brother would like we still get those fancy like crystal glasses my mom would put out and you know, we’d pour it in there like with champagne. You really thought she was big really. And then now you go to the adult table. It don’t feel the same. You know, don’t get that same vibe. But once you move to the adults table if you start hearing the adult conversations, Yes, that’s true, which was definitely worth giving up. The Martinelli’s that was worth it. But what you got to do as a kid at least I did. I don’t know about you guys, but I you got to pretend like you don’t know what they’re talking about. Yeah. So they keep talking about it. Right? Like if if they make a crude joke and you laugh, they can be like, Oh, no, he gets it. we can’t say anything. So I had to pretend I didn’t get it. That was my best skill. Yeah, it’s just sitting there not laughing at shit that was hilarious. got, I got some interesting characters in my family lemme tell you so. A lot of comedians, a lot of storytellers that was the best for me. But if you guys ever, ever did the like that fried turkey in the bucket or like a turducken or anything not traditional like that?

Mikko Miller 15:59
No, not the fried Turkey. I don’t I don’t think we were bold enough to make that type of life changing attempt at a turkey. Many YouTube videos and too many people in a new that had major mishaps for us even tried that all of our turkeys have always been loving, roasted or carved straight out of like, what’s that restaurant used to carve Turkey for us? Like a Boston Market type of thing we used to do like Boston Market Thanksgivings in Maryland, and yet, those are always pre cut and everything so made it all easy. So long answer to a long answer to a no.

Calvin Tilokee 16:42
It’s right. We got time. We got time. We ain’t no time limit. This ain’t jeopardy. So you good.

Mikko Miller 16:50
Rip Alex. Back. Rip. rip rip.

Calvin Tilokee 16:53
Yeah, shout out to Trebeck. Rest inpiece. To the O.G.

Steve 17:00
we haven’t did a turducken. I think fried turkey breast. Never deep fried Turkey. Hmm. I mean, I’d certainly try not interested in attempting. Because Yeah,

Calvin Tilokee 17:15
yeah, leave that to uh, you know, professional. somebody with a big yard. Doesn’t want to blow up the whole house. I’m with you though I would try it. I want to try it. But I’m in an apartment anyway, so we definitely aint doing that in here. But we definitely want to dry it. It’d be like that scene of boomerang. Remember when the smoke was all up in the ceiling? He’s like, that’s not smoke. That’s aroma. But Mikko, you reminded me. It’s when you mentioned Boston Market. So there was one Thanksgiving that my mom she was traveling probably went home to Trinidad. That’s always just me. My brother, my dad. My dad was like, Look, Yo, I ain’t cooking. Oh. Y’all just want to do Boston Market or something? Like I yeah, that sounds good. So we head over to Boston Market. Pull up, go up in there. And you know, we get like the roasted chicken the rotisserie chicken and like the sides and everything like that. And the girl behind the counter. goes to my dad. She’s like, Oh, you have really pretty eyes. going to give you some extra sides. me and my brother were like Oh, yeah. Yeah. Shout out to my pops because he’d be listening. So he gon try to sit there try to front like this ain’t happen but it’s on the airwaves. Now True story.

Mikko Miller 18:40
Again, got recognition. geek guy.

Calvin Tilokee 18:43
He got be trying to front. And that’s not the first time that happened. First time Yeah, we left for like, extra mashed potatoes, fries, whatever. Okay. We gotta come shopping with you.

Mikko Miller 18:58
No phone number on the receipt? none of that? Ah,

Calvin Tilokee 19:01
I don’t remember anything like that. But I might just

Mikko Miller 19:05
leave it. Let’s leave it.

Calvin Tilokee 19:06
We know we ate well, we were okay. Yeah. You know, so that’s I must say we didn’t go hungry. So he did what a dad supposed to do. We made sure his kids were fed any means necessary. Exactly. That’s the sacrifice you make as a parent, man.

Mikko Miller 19:25
A lot of people trying to read between the lines right there

Calvin Tilokee 19:30
do what you got to do for your kids, man. You know?

Mikko Miller 19:33
That’s dope.

Calvin Tilokee 19:35
So are there any traditional things you guys do in your house that are unique, so anything that’s not necessarily turkey and stuffing that you guys always do? in your household?

Mikko Miller 19:50
A little tough, you know, because we’re Filipino. And here in California, we usually but 90% of Thanksgiving. I’ve spent here has been with Filipino families either with, you know, my wife’s family or my aunts and uncles and Filipino food is always around at every Thanksgiving and East Coast people are going to kill me for this pumpkin pie. Pumpkin Pie because you know, East Coast folks, we like sweet potato pie. Wait here, they love anything pumpkin. So pumpkin pie and Filipino food. We always got to have Filipino food rice, we always got to have rice, okay? Like stuff like that. And a couple of other things givings have had a frickin Lumpia. If you guys know what that is, it’s fried egg rolls with sweet and sour sauce that you dip it in, and there’s always lumpia in a Filipino household, no matter where you go. It can be a Thanksgiving, Christmas. Baptism Bar Mitzvah. There’s lumpia this just the thing is the thing that

Calvin Tilokee 20:51
I loved it Yeah. No, my wife has a friend who’s Filipino. We’ve we’ve done some outings to her house and stuff. Oh my god. Like I think that’s all I ate. Like when I see those. I’m just boom, that’s it. I could fill up on those. That’s, that’s amazing.

Mikko Miller 21:05
They’re always there.

Calvin Tilokee 21:08
Mm hmm. Okay, okay. What about you steve?

Steve 21:12
usually do the there would be a football game playin that my parents would get really into because my mom’s from Columbus. So she’d be rooting for Ohio State. And, and it was always food at their house. It’s just ridiculous.

Calvin Tilokee 21:33
Is she making her world famous cookies? Does she still make those?

Steve 21:37
Oh, yeah, dude. Every year? I’ll tell the story

Calvin Tilokee 21:42
yeah, yeah, yeah, we gotta

Steve 21:45
Mikko you’ll get a kick out of this. The cookies. Calvin’s referring to are anatomically correct gingerbread people.

Calvin Tilokee 21:57
Yeah, yeah, you. You heard that, right.

Steve 22:00
It’s no joke. My mom was in the medical profession. And she whenever she would have to work around Christmas, to boost morale. Everybody would do all of these off the wall things and hers was these cookies that she became well known for. Like the doctors all wanted them and, and all that stuff. It was so cool. And so it’s carried on to this day she makes them. And like the first time I ever saw her make it up. You can’t unsee that shit.

Calvin Tilokee 22:37
I could totally imagine. But she had to be high school. Where she I don’t know. I saw these cookies. I got these cookies. I was like, What the hell? Cookie looks like Pam Anderson. Yeah, that’s fantastic.

Steve 22:56
My mom’s awesome.

Calvin Tilokee 22:57
But yeah, man. Now you hit it on the head for me. Thanksgiving is right up there. My favorite holidays. But all you do is just eat, watch football and take naps. It’s amazing. It’s like two, three days in a row.

Steve 23:09
And the leftovers. Do you guys ever make sandwiches out of them? leftovers? like yeah, an entire sandwich of all that stuff?

Mikko Miller 23:17
Fuck Yeah,

Calvin Tilokee 23:17
absolutely.

Steve 23:18
What’s in your sandwich?

Mikko Miller 23:20
mine is stuffing. I usually put a pan fried Turkey. Or if we have ham and fry ham, maybe make like a scrambled egg. Put it in there with some stuffing, cranberry sauce. Make a sandwich out of that.

Calvin Tilokee 23:36
Yeah, for me, it’s always just stuffing stuffing is my favorite part. And last year last year, we actually ordered from a local restaurant for Tina. And they’re known for their Italian food, mainly their pizza which is off the hook. But they put together this Thanksgiving package where you can put like four to six people or nine to 12 people you just they give you everything they give you. You choose between the turkey or lasagna and then you get like potatoes stuffing dessert. It’s fantastic. Especially for lazy people like me, me and my wife. We just like Look, that’s what we do when you order it, pick it up and then you’re eating for three four days, but the stuffing was off the hook. And I swear for my meals for the two days after Thanksgiving was just stuffing in between bread. Talk about a food coma

Mikko Miller 24:26
all carbs.

Calvin Tilokee 24:27
Yes, just straight carbs man like I don’t do turkey trots, or nothing like that. So I wasn’t burning off any of those calories. You’re just gonna sleep it off and you know let the body relax in digest and then wake me up when you ready. You know, I’m not jogging at all or anything like that. But

Mikko Miller 24:44
I do get turkey trots to the toilet with food.

Unknown Speaker 24:55
Oh, man, we kind of try

Steve 24:58
fried Turkey.

Mikko Miller 24:59
Yeah. Man shit,

Calvin Tilokee 25:06
But yea man So for those of you guys out there who are local to where I am, you can head to Fortinapizza.com mentioned this podcast, you’re gonna get $10 off of that order. If you go for the Thanksgiving package, which I highly recommend, because it’s fantastic, and I’m most likely doing it again this year.

Steve 25:26
I gotta look something like that about where I am.

Calvin Tilokee 25:29
A lot of restaurants do. Oh, that was actually a question I have for you guys. Would you go to a restaurant on Thanksgiving? Yes.

Mikko Miller 25:38
Flat Out doesn’t Yes. If a restaurant wants to say, Hey, we’re doing a Thanksgiving lunch, brunch, dinner. Come join us and maybe have like a couple other people join us and make it like a little Thanksgiving meal community family type thing. I’m there, dude, my wife and I would love to do that kind of stuff. So if you’re listening, send the invite.

Calvin Tilokee 26:00
Yeah, for sure. Sure. I think a lot of people don’t even think about it. You know, I think most people is like, Hey, we got to cook or we own a family’s house. But obviously things are different this year. And, you know, check out your local spots. Probably doing some cool stuff. All right, now it’s time for the food battle because you got to make some tough choices. On Thanksgiving. We’ve talked about Turkey. Some people serve ham. turkey or ham fellas?

Mikko Miller 26:28
turkeys the traditional answer, but I think my family my family loves honeybaked ham. I’m like, they would probably pick honeybaked ham over turkey all day long. Yeah. Yeah. How about you?

Calvin Tilokee 26:47
on Thanksgiving? I’m gonna have to go Turkey. Because right. But right. But Christmas. Christmas. I’m all ham. Yeah, my family they like boil or however she makes it I dunno. I’m probably not boil. That sounds gross. But it just slice that on some homemade bread with some butter little mustard. Yeah, yeah, that’s more of a Christmas thing for us. But that honey roasted ham does sound pretty bomb. Alright, so if you go in Turkey white meat a dark meat?

Steve 27:18
White meat

Mikko Miller 27:19
Oh, dark meat

Calvin Tilokee 27:21
same dark meat.

Mikko Miller 27:23
Yeah, I’m dark. meat once you go black you don’t go back dude

Yeah, I can’t do turkey breast or chicken breast. It’s got to be leg or thigh or a wing.

Calvin Tilokee 28:01
I like all those same parts.

Mikko Miller 28:03
Yes. Yes.

Calvin Tilokee 28:09
Oh, boy. All right rolls. Or cornbread

Steve 28:12
cornbread.

Mikko Miller 28:13
Yeah, I agree with Steve cornbread.

Calvin Tilokee 28:16
Yeah, unanimous

Mikko Miller 28:17
Aint nothing wrong with that

Steve 28:23
Biscuits over cornbread

Calvin Tilokee 28:26
Biscuits over cornbread..oooh

Steve 28:30
Cornbread over rolls, biscuits over cornbread. For me.

Calvin Tilokee 28:33
You must drink a lot of water at dinner because you in turkey breast and biscuits. That’s a choking hazard right there

Steve 28:42
for anybody who’s had a meal with me. I always have like, at least four beverages in front of me. That are all different.

Calvin Tilokee 28:49
Okay.

Steve 28:50
I’m always drinking something.

Mikko Miller 28:52
Nice.

Calvin Tilokee 28:53
Okay. Oh, yeah.

Steve 28:55
And then you have like the gravy. Underwater bullshit. Yeah, um,

Calvin Tilokee 28:59
yeah, he got a slather gravy on everything. Okay, okay, well, I’m just saying you got to gotta be safe. Because you got you got imagine you got a bite a biscuit. And some turkey breasts. Any amount? Somebody tell a good joke. Oh, yeah, you know? Yeah.

Well, that’s a good way to go. I mean, if I want to go I want to go eating food.

Mikko Miller 29:32
Food.

Calvin Tilokee 29:39
lord have mercy.

Mikko Miller 29:41
Daddy. Oh,

clam clam is a food. clam is seafood Alright,

Calvin Tilokee 30:00
the final one we touched on earlier. me guys one earlier. Pumpkin Pie. Sweet potato pie. Or apple pie.

Steve 30:10
Apple Pie.

Calvin Tilokee 30:12
Yes.

Steve 30:13
I mean, they’re all there. They’re all so close. But apple pie

Mikko Miller 30:20
I’m on the other end of the spectrum. My sweet potato. Then I’m at pumpkin have apple pie last.

Calvin Tilokee 30:29
Oh,

Mikko Miller 30:30
yeah. Yeah, I’m not an apple pie kind of guy.

Steve 30:35
Have you ever stacked pie on top of pie? like Apple on top of pumpkin or cherry on top of apple. And then vice versa. It’s double decker pie

Calvin Tilokee 30:48
That sounds incredible.

Mikko Miller 30:50
I’ve had ice cream with pie but not pie on pie.

Steve 30:55
Pie on pie

Mikko Miller 30:58
alamode Oh, when you put ice cream on it or am I trippin?

Calvin Tilokee 31:01
Yeah, yeah.

Mikko Miller 31:04
Yeah, no, not pie on pie. But yeah, have apple pie labs. I’m not an apple pie kind of guy. Um, yeah, just. I’m not a big fan of apple pie. There’s only one apple pie that I like him is from this like little cheesy Korean buffet place and they have this like, flaky crust with warm apple pie in between. And that’s the only pie that I would ever get. Like, if I saw apple pie at a store. I completely ignore it and go straight for sweet potato.

Steve 31:31
Nice. Okay.

Calvin Tilokee 31:33
Yeah, I’m with Steve. I’m going apple pie. I’m going apple. Yeah, Apple right at the top. Then sweet potato then pumpkin.

Mikko Miller 31:41
Pumpkins last for you huh?

Calvin Tilokee 31:42
Yeah. Yeah, like too many pumpkin foods.

Mikko Miller 31:47
I didn’t think I would either. But living in the West Coast. Everybody goes bananas and apeshit over pumpkin anything. latte pie. You know all that kind of shit. If you could snorted it probably snort that should instead of cocaine out here.

Calvin Tilokee 32:09
Out here shit. Yeah, she just reminded me of this. Did you guys see Chris Rock on SNL couple weeks ago?

Steve 32:16
Yeah.

No.

Calvin Tilokee 32:18
He remembers. Oh, Stevie. Sorry. So you remember in his intro, when he was talking about you know, it’s COVID and everything and he’s like, everybody in this audience has been tested. I walk in like all week. Yeah, people take him at temperature and like sticking things up by nose. He’s like, I haven’t had this much stuff stuffed up my nose since I shared a dressing room with Chris Farley.

Steve 32:48
Man is either Oh, Christ.

Calvin Tilokee 32:50
I’m pretty sure chris farley had to be high for a lot of those skits.

Oh, yeah, dude.

I just the other day just rewatch the I live in a van down by the river.

Steve 33:00
Oh, yeah.

Calvin Tilokee 33:02
There’s no way he’s not high. He has to be he’s bezerk in that shit.

Steve 33:09
Speaking of doing scenes, hi. I was reading an article about Dennis Quaid. He was talking about being in just three. And it was just 3d. And he said that at the time he goes up. He was high for like three quarters of the film. It was crazy. Like, I love that film. So I immediately went back and I’m watching it and I’m like examining every aspect. In the in the fucking thing. Trying to identify this great movie. My childhood. Yeah,

Calvin Tilokee 33:40
that’s crazy. I wonder how many stories there are like that though. Like if you don’t really talk to these actors. Like Yeah, I don’t remember that scene. But I remember in college when we used to go play basketball some of these guys like they’d smoke weed and then go play basketball for four hours. How?

Mikko Miller 33:59
sad give him a lot I’ve had em ran up the court once back down and he was like fuck it I’m done.

Calvin Tilokee 34:06
But that’s what that’s what a weedhead supposed to be like that’s that’s pothead behavior. running down the court dunking and shit like I can’t do that sober what’s wrongyou people like it’s true. Imagine what you would do if you weren’t Hi. Ah, yeah, that’s true. That’s true. That’s the way I was looking at that. But anyway, so yeah, time for this week’s segment of I don’t like that jerk.

Steve 34:38
I’m gonna make it real quick. President Trump, for fuck sake. Just enough of this nonsense. You can run again in 2024 fuck off until then. Let the whole transition a peaceful transition of power. Proceed. That’s it. I

Mikko Miller 34:55
Nice. Nice. I planted that one up.

Calvin Tilokee 34:58
Yeah. But you know, we at the Thanksgiving table some politics gotta come up at some point. Right? Right, right. But at least this year you could have the people who don’t believe in the the same politics. They could be on zoom. You just mute them when they start talking shit.

Steve 35:17
Yeah, would you ever troll a relative? Just to, like, anonymously troll a relative?

Mikko Miller 35:27
No,

Calvin Tilokee 35:28
I don’t like it like give me an example.

Steve 35:31
Let’s say there’s an uncle whose politics don’t jive with yours. And he has no problem telling you about his point of view. And would it be fun? or interesting or anything to troll that person?

Calvin Tilokee 35:52
Hell, yes. Yeah. Hell yeah. I got stuck on the anonymous part. I do that shit to your face. Yeah, if if you want to be talking that mess, you know, and you lose then yeah, you’re gonna you’re gonna have to hear it. That’s that’s just the rules of life. What goes around comes around you won’t be up in my face about Trump or whatever it is. When you lose better be ready for that smack.

Steve 36:18
Let me ask you this. Do any of your family members politics differ from yours at but to your face? They’re just nice, normal relatives but you know that there’s a side of them on social media that thinks a certain way? Hmm.

Calvin Tilokee 36:33
Well, yeah. Yeah. I do. I mean, it’s not that that is not drastic, like democrat republican with pretty much all lean left in my family, but there’s some lean furthee left and some lean more. I’m gonna use the term pro black. You know, where, where it’s, you know, we when you go down too far down that road, so we have a problem holding our own accountable. And I don’t I don’t agree with that. So yeah, we we have those things, but we’ve had plenty of spirited debates at our table. So at the end of the day, everybody’s family, and it’s all good. But yeah, that’s why like I’m saying for us, nobody really does that. On the low. Like, if they say it on social, they pretty much say it at the table, too. So you just go back at him. But in your case, Steve, I would. I would like let me just make sure I have it straight. So this person doesn’t say it at the dinner table or in person. But they’re out there on social media, then yeah, I might do it anonymously, just to fuck with them. But not because I wouldn’t want them to know as me just because Well, hey, if you gonna be shady, then I’ll be shady. Like, I’ll meet you at that level.

Steve 37:45
Reddit is social media, right? Pretty much.

Mikko Miller 37:48
Yeah.

Steve 37:49
Yeah. I’m on Reddit all the time. I love Reddit. I love going down rabbit holes and whatnot. And there’s a subreddit called, am I the asshole. And it is one of my favorite things on the planet. And so you go down deep on these things. And I read that in one of the comments or sub cons, because then the subcommands go on for like thousands of comments. It’s incredible. And it just stuck out to me. Like, why would that be something someone really did?

Calvin Tilokee 38:18
Listen, you and I have similar, we’ve shared some stories on this show. And I know you do have similar approach to that kind of stuff. Like I got, I got people lined up. Like I got a list. I got a particular cousin who likes to likes to, he likes to talk shit. But he only likes to do it when there’s a lot of people around, right? Like when it’s just us in the house or like me, him and my mom or whatever he’s he’s cool. But as soon as his friend come around, or my uncle who’s who’s really close with, then he wants to start throwing his little jabs, you know about my weight, or, you know, talking shit about my dogs and that kind of thing. So, it catches me off guard because I’m gonna kind of like, I think anybody could tell, I don’t, I don’t throw jabs. I just, I’m gonna knock you up. Like, I don’t really do that. Like, I don’t jab. So when it comes to doing that stuff at the dinner table, or whatever, I feel like if I retaliate, the way I normally would, is gonna cause a scene. So I tend to stay quiet. So I don’t know if he doesn’t think he thinks I don’t notice or he can continue to get away with it. But he’s in the cross here. So the next Thanksgiving or Christmas. I’ve learned how to jab I must say that I’ve learned how to jab and but my jazz might be strong. Yeah, I mean, that’s all I’m saying. So

Mikko Miller 39:34
watch your back fish!

Calvin Tilokee 39:35
Exactly what your back then you go give me a fruit cocktail.

Steve 39:43
Squirrel master aint gonna be around to protect you forever.

Calvin Tilokee 39:46
Exactly. Squirrel master aint gon be there for you all the time. Next time i come for you, I’m gonna want some cocktail fruit! got something for yo ass

that’s a great lead into my favorite segment. Get off my lawn. I’m gonna lead it off this week. Yeah, cuz this this one is a minor thing. But it’s a major thing when you try to get something done. And recently, we’ve been using instacart. So we get groceries delivered to the house, and I kind of get it, right. But they bring the shopping bags with no handles. because nobody’s doing plastic bags anymore. It’s all paper bags. But the paper bags are recycled, and they have no handles on them. And they’re big. So I have two hands, and two arms. So you know, you got to cradle them like a baby sort of. Now what I’m gonna do if there’s more than two, we all know the rule is one trip. One trip of groceries, I’m not making two trips. So Can y’all put some handles on these bags? Would it kill somebody to put an extra little bit of recycled paper at the top so I can grab like three or four of them and not have to go up and down two steps three, four times to bring in groceries it’s bullshit. had me so heated this week, and I know it’s first world problems they brought the groceries to my house. So you know, I really got no space to complain, but I’m gonna do it anyway. Put some goddamn handles on the bags, please.

Mikko Miller 41:32
You know what they do at some of these places. They take one of those peel off stickers. And they like attach stickers on each side and create like handle but if the groceries are heavy, I don’t think that was like fuck you.

Calvin Tilokee 41:45
Yeah, exactly. Gotcha. You gonna have eggs at the bottom? Of course.

Mikko Miller 41:49
Yeah, you know? Yeah, broken toes.

Calvin Tilokee 41:54
Like this, put some extra paper on the top.

Steve 41:58
This is uncanny. Because Calvin’s, the thing that Calvin’s asking for is the thing that I was going to get off my lawn about. My wife and I go out on these nice walks on Fridays, because my daughter is at my kid’s house, we go on this nice long walk. Just just to get out and exercise and talk. And we go to this grocery store that’s owned by a very large company. She gets this thing of soup, this cauliflower soup. And I’m reaching in and we leave and shit and I’m reaching to grab a soda that I bought and the fucking handle breaks. The soup spills everywhere. And now all of my shit is covered in her soup. Because that fucking handle on that shitty on that fucking bag.

Calvin Tilokee 42:45
will make them quality handles. Yes, right. We want handles but we wanted to be quality goddamnit adhesive.

Steve 42:51
There’s got to be a good adhesive that these people can figure out that doesn’t resolve Yes, hearing

Mikko Miller 42:56
Steve is talking about what I was talking about. What do you make these handles?

Calvin Tilokee 42:59
This 2020 we’ve put a man on the moon we can’t make a bag with a proper handle?

Mikko Miller 43:05
Go on make a fucking bumper don’t fall off? People.

Steve 43:15
First, people like miles I walked three miles home. My hands are covered in this shit. Huh? I look like I fucking jerked off like 10 times.

Unknown Speaker 43:27
My fucking

Mikko Miller 43:31
be walking around like he’s a loser.

Calvin Tilokee 43:42
Oh, man.

Mikko Miller 43:45
Mines not quite that bad. My get off my lawn. And my jerk of the week is good old Uncle Sam. And here’s why. I’m pissed off at Uncle Sam especially at my place of employment because we have to go back to work on Black Friday. The biggest holiday shopping day of the year for electronics, which I love. We have to go back to work so I can’t participate in any of the online festivities and shopping and whatnot and who wants to go to work the Friday before Thanksgiving? You spent 24 hours stuffing your fat face. Getting fucking food coma? Who wants to go to work the next day? Just make it a damn two day holiday. You know, like Uncle Sam, please make Black Friday and national holiday.

Calvin Tilokee 44:32
That’s it. You got to start writing letters to the government for 36 years.

Exactly. Yeah, we gon have a statue to you one day, and here’s Mikko, the creator of Black Friday as a national holiday. national hero

Mikko Miller 44:57
wrote a letter every day for 24 years.

Calvin Tilokee 45:04
Man All right. Time for the Chris Rock quote of the week.

Mikko Miller 45:09
I think we’re all gonna have the same one. I feel like it mine is the basic we got so much food in America we’re allergic to food allergic shit. You think anyone in Rwanda got a fucking lactose intolerance?

Calvin Tilokee 45:29
don’t eat no red meat. No, no no. dont eat no green meat. Okay

Mikko Miller 45:35
bite the shit out of it

Steve 45:39
that’s the fucking one I was looking at.

Mikko Miller 45:41
Yeah, see? I knew it

Calvin Tilokee 45:46
I do I do got a different one though. I got this one is uh you know because we all gonna be around family you know we were just talking about that kind of stuff and he was like your uncle’s prepare you for life. If you got enough uncles, You got every type of uncle. You got your gay uncle. You got alcoholic uncle. You got your stealing uncle. You got your molester uncle. everybody got that one molester uncle! Where them kids, they with johnny get them kids! get them kids! Dont you leave em with ya uncle johnny

Mikko Miller 46:29
Fucking Johnny, walk it off.

Calvin Tilokee 46:32
Walk it off.

Oh, everybody, enjoy your Thanksgiving. And definitely enjoy the time with your family. You only get one.

Mikko Miller 46:48
Yes. That’s your family

Calvin Tilokee 46:51
That’s your family. All right, and now it’s time for the shout outs Mikko. You want to shout out your peeps again?

Mikko Miller 47:00
Um, yes. So we did a donation for No Kid Hungry. And they are at no kidhungry.org they’re an organization that feeds children for breakfast, lunch and after school. And you can find them on no kid hungry.org and hit me on my DMS Mikko underscore eats and I can get you the details.

Calvin Tilokee 47:18
Awesome. Awesome. Well, another great episode here guys, talking about some Thanksgiving our favorite foods and of course sharing some funny stories. This is Calvin, aka Revparblems aka revpartravels aka revpargrowth, aka revparblems.com.

Mikko Miller 47:37
And this is Mikko the Filipino, aka Mikko underscore eats. You can catch me on Instagram and hope you guys have a good one.

Steve 47:46
And this is Steve crisis podcast with Cal and Mikko. Have a great week.

Calvin Tilokee 47:51
All right, thank you for joining us on another episode of midlife crisis podcast. If you enjoyed today’s episode. Please leave us a review on iTunes and tell a friend to stay up to date with us on Instagram at midlife crisis podcast and on Twitter at midlife pot. Show Notes for this and all episodes are available on midlife crisis podcast comm where you can also sign up for their mailing list. Drop us a note, let us know what topics you’d like us to discuss. Thanks for tuning in, and we’ll catch you on the next one.

Mikko Miller 48:19
Let’s go

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